Saturday 16 June 2012

All aspects of love- betrayal, hatred, and depression.

I was alone my heart was cold, it was a stone my soul was lonely like a stone - there was no moss
And when I danced I danced alone but then I did not dance because I *was* alone. So I did not dance
I shuffled through life invisible to all the happy couples who would mock me with their merry laughter - "ha-ha-ha"
The only sound I heard in my lonely silent world was the rusty hammer of my heart nailing at the hatred in my soul

But then you came, and my life was turned upside down
You showed me the beauty of the things that I had never seen
Like a snowflake that melts on the eyelash of a startled deer
Or the painting of a dog that wears a deerstalker and smokes a pipe that made you laugh so heartily, but I had previously thought was rubbish
Or the duck that lands so clumsily on a frozen pond in winter
but the intoxicating power of our love transforms this simple act into an anthropomorphic drama where Mr. Duck's embarrassed and the other ducks are laughing, quack quack quack quack quack,

AND THEN YOU LEFT!
And I have died a thousand deaths and I will die a thousand more!
I thought you were an angel - you turned out to be a whore!
And everything has turned to dust! Everything is infected with the plague!
Why did you have to sleep with Craig?
"Oh he's so sensitive, he's got a tattoo."
Yeah, carving your name with a compass in my forehead was not enough for you!

The snow flake on the eye of the deer has turned to puss that oozes from an open wound
The deer now blind it stumbles into a ravine
The duck lies shredded in a pancake, soaking in the hoisin of your lies
The dog has moved from the pipe to 60 cigarettes a day, and coughs away his life in the cold neon research lab of your betrayal.

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